Stephen Paddock is the much talked about topic in the news as of late. This painful tragedy, the Vegas massacre leads us all wondering why would a person commit such an act of violence and destruction? Is mental illness the motive in the Vegas massacre? Is it possible he had an undiagnosed mental illness? Is mental illness the most recent considered motive? As there has been a range of motives considered and thus reported in the news to date, though not one is definitive as of yet. Today’s blog article through a psychotherapeutic lens includes the following 5 categories:  

  1. Mental health problems are a risk for older adults
  2. Why do we want to know why
  3. Motive theory
  4. Mental health history
  5. Double life       

[click to continue…]

Leave a comment

Mental Health in one’s older years (which is deemed age 60 and above), is an important topic. 1 in 4 older Americans will experience some type of mental illness in their lives (source: My Medicare Matters in partnership with Mental Health America). 1 in 5 older adults experience mental health concerns that are not a normal part of aging (source: LIFE Senior Services). Yet sadly, research shows that mental illness in the older years is under-diagnosed and under-treated. The Men’s Club of Sharon which has well over 300 members from throughout Massachusetts (along with a wait-list to join – many of the members pointed out with pride how popular it is), of whose members are men in their 60s, 70s, 80s, 90s and above, invited me to speak at their most recent event. 

The focus of my speech included 3 main categories:

  • Facts about mental health and aging
  • Concrete tips and do-able practical life-style strategies to live a life of mental health and wellness
  • Question and answer session  

[click to continue…]

1 comment

It was such an honor to be the first and only to date Relationship Expert invited to speak at the Women2Women Leadership Conference held by Empower Peace. On Thursday July 27th, 2017 I educated 100+ young women from over 30 countries on topics such as: empowerment, self-esteem and confidence, and achieving one’s goals as it specifically ties in to relationship health. Relationship health, and these topics within are special to my heart. It was so fun and meaningful to provide concrete tips and practical tools for how to remain true to one’s passion amidst the nay-sayers (and they will keep on coming). During this interactive speech I explained how to positively navigate the challenge of negativity, remain true to one’s beliefs and vision, and have the courage and determination to achieve one’s goals. 

[click to continue…]

Leave a comment

The suicide of Aaron Hernandez has led to a discussion for many about the very topic of suicide. A serious topic. As a Psychotherapist, I have found through the years that the most common question asked when someone commits suicide (whether it is a celebrity, a family member, a friend…) is: why? Thus, this brief blog article touches upon the topic of why, in relationship to suicide.

Dr. Ruskin provides psychotherapeutic perspective on the topic of suicide.

Aaron’s demeanor in his most recent court room experience has led the public to analyze and wonder what his behavior meant, if there were warning signs to have known in advance that he was going to commit suicide, and if there were triggers. NBC News Boston came to my office based in Massachusetts on April 19th, the very day of his suicide, where I addressed on air these very points. During this interview when I was asked about his court room tears, I explained that we, as the “audience” so to speak, see a person’s response not just to the experience (in this case Aaron’s response to the court judgement), we are seeing behavior in response to “something deeper that is going on within the person’s self, the inner thoughts”. We as a public do not always know what those inner thoughts are of another person (in this case Aaron), when we see a particular behavior. I further explained: “to get to a point where a person commits suicide, it is a symptom of a loss of hope.” As to what Aaron lost hope about, what he felt he could no longer to live to endure, perhaps only he knew, and/or with the coming days we as a public may learn more.

If you would like to watch my interview on NBC New Boston, I invite you to do so: A psychological look at Aaron Hernandez’s suicide.

  • If you or someone you know is feeling hopeless, please seek out help from a mental health professional.

Leave a comment

NBC News Boston – TV show: ‘This is New England’ provided it’s viewers with a touching love story of a couple who died 6 hours apart, told by their adult son. During this special segment for Heart Health Month and Valentine’s Day, I was asked to share my expertise as a Psychotherapist whom specializes in matters of the heart. Specifically, as a Marriage and Family Therapist I provided a special message that aired during this segment entitled: Can you die of a broken heart?  (My message begins at the 3 minute 44 second mark). I invite my following to check out this moving story. 

Additionally, if you are interested in learning more about love and loss including: tips for coping with grief, different kinds of love, and the mind-body connection (the heart and brain in communication), I invite you to check out my blog article: Love and Loss .

Leave a comment

February is heart health month. Coming up this week is Valentine’s Day. Some say that I am in the ‘heart business’, as I am a Marriage and Family Therapist providing relationship counseling. Love loss and love gain is a common theme in relationships, be it the marital relationship or the parent-child relationship, the relationship one has with one’s professional self (e.g., loss of a job you put your all into), loss of a pet… Additionally, there are those of whom believe the heart is the place where we experience many of our feelings, thus the heart has a voice. Put all of the above together, and that is what led me to write this particular blog article where you will find 4 key points through a relationship therapist’s lens: 1) the heart and brain connection, 2) emotional pain presents itself physically, 3) different kinds of love, 4) seven coping tips for the hurting heart/love loss.   [click to continue…]

Leave a comment

The democratic house members who are not attending the upcoming Presidential inauguration are throwing an adult version of a temper tantrum and displaying unsportsmanlike conduct at the least, and at worst they are demonstrating warring behaviors within our country exacerbating division and hatred while overtly displaying a lack of leadership. 

[click to continue…]

Leave a comment

The latest timely topic in the news includes a debate about the song: ‘Baby it’s cold outside’. This is an oldie holiday song currently being picked at/debated on social media as unacceptable male behavior, inferring the women is the victim. It concerns me that holidays cannot be holidays with songs from the past to simply be enjoyed as they intended to be. It seems as such all becomes a political debate… THAT song is being picked at when there are many songs of the now that are profoundly blatantly disturbing.  [click to continue…]

Leave a comment

As a psychotherapist, Marriage and Family Therapist, who provides counseling to working mothers and stay at home mothers, and is thus well aware of the challenges of balancing, navigating, and managing multiple parts of one’s life (children, work, marriage, personal health…), today’s blog addresses my genuine disappointment regarding the negative commentary via social media about Kellyanne Conway’s lack of acceptance of a full time position in the Trump administration. Additionally, as a woman, business owner, mother, and wife, I understand on a personal identifiable level the significance and importance of the decisions that we make as women. As the choices we make on our parenting journey is meaningful and impactful for ourselves and our family’s health and wellness.   [click to continue…]

Leave a comment

As a mental health professional in private practice I work with people of varied life experiences, each of whom are on their own unique journey. Couples/marriage counseling, individual counseling (youth, adults), and family counseling; topics ranging from relationship issues (e.g., parent-child relationship, husband-wife relationship, dating) – to – personal mental health (e.g., anxiety, depression, self worth) – to – professional health and wellness (e.g., goal accomplishment, career discovery/transition) – to – family and extended family relationship dynamic issues. There are various presenting challenges clientele come to my office to receive help for, today’s blog article will focus on the identified athlete. Specifically, through the years some of my clientele have included young children who define themselves as athletes based upon their sport of interest, to the High School level, college athletes, and professional athletes of whom have discovered their profession and their passion as one in the same. Let us take a moment to think about the following: what happens emotionally to a person when he defines himself as an athlete (whether it is football, basketball, baseball . . .) is no longer an athlete? If your identity is as an athlete, and you are no longer an athlete, what’s next? [click to continue…]

Leave a comment