Hollywood’s Sex Scandal – Sexual Abuse – Steps To Heal

by Dr. Karen Ruskin on November 4, 2017

Hollywood’s Sex Scandals is a leading topic in the news as of late. Specifically focusing on the influx of allegations of sexual abuse, including Corey Feldman sharing his story, The Dr. Oz Show hosted a panel of guest experts to discuss. This panel included myself: Psychotherapist Dr. Karen Ruskin, Legal Analyst Michelle Suskauer, and Page Six Reporter Carlos Greer. On that note, I wish to take a moment in today’s blog to share a few steps in which how to begin the healing process if you have experienced sexual abuse, as well as provide my readers with a direct link to the interview if you missed it live on air.  

Steps To Heal From Sexual Abuse

One of the first steps that helps the healing process to begin, if you have experienced sexual abuse, is to confront this very truth with yourself. Sometimes a person wants to lock away their secret as it is too painful to admit even to themselves. It is the lies we tell ourselves that corrode our emotional spirit and damage our mental health and wellness.

An additional next important step is to share this pain, this truth, with someone you trust and who cares about you. Most commonly this is not enough to help someone to heal from their pain and move forward in their life, though a very important next step and significant part of moving forward. Secrets are quite damaging to one’s emotional and physical health, it grows like a cancer. It must be released. Opening the box of pain by sharing one’s story, plays a role in freeing one’s self from the secret that is damaging one’s mind and body. In my work as a therapist, the release that I see when a child or adult shares their story with someone who cares, is extremely deep and plays a significant part in their journey of moving forward.

The next step is not to remain stuck in one’s ‘pain-mind/body’. Therefore one must discover who one is. In my work with those of whom have experienced sexual abuse, it is not uncommon for them to define themselves, view themselves as a victim and that becomes their sole identity. They have lost the parts of themselves they were prior to the trauma, and do not know who they can be separate from the trauma post the trauma of sexual abuse. Specifically if you define yourself as this pained event, you will live in pain and be that pain no matter how many years have passed since the actual event. The identity of self is what affects how we feel emotionally, the decisions one makes each day, and the relationships we have.

 If one views one’s self, one’s identity, through the lens of pain, shame, blame, and feels damaged, then one feels emotionally and thus physically ill. For the mind and body are linked. If rather one views one’s self as smart, strong, beautiful inside and out and believes that the action the abuser took is their demon, is the abusers shame to own, is the abuser’s sickness… then, and only then can one free one’s self from self blame.

  • To relieve one’s self from thinking that they did something wrong is a significant next step entering into the next phase of healing.
  • To discover one’s beautiful identity of self is an important next step in healing. 
  • To make the choice that the trauma need not be their identity of self is a tremendous part of the healing process.

Dr. Karen Ruskin on The Dr. Oz Show

If you missed this interview live, you are invited to watch it on demand: Why are more and more sexual abuse victims speaking out and sharing their stories?

If you or someone you know has been sexually abused, please seek out help. If you or someone you know is having thoughts of abusing another person, or has abused another person, please seek out help.

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