Man’s Reasons For Getting Married By Steven Crowder- Marriage Therapist Analyzes

by Dr. Karen Ruskin on January 27, 2013

A Man’s Top 5 Reasons For Growing Up And Getting Married – is the title of an opinion article written by Steven Crowder for FOX News. This marriage therapist analyzes and says:

  • Crowder nailed it!
  • Thumbs up for this article!
  • Right on!
  • Fun and accurate!

Read on below for this doc’s commentary on Crowder’s article.

Dr. Karen Ruskin – The Marriage Therapist

For 20 years I have been working with couples to help them have a happy and healthy marriage. I provide concrete tips to help couples achieve their relational goals whether in my office where I am based in Massachusetts, on FOX 25 News Boston during my regular monthly segment where viewers submit their relationship questions and I answer them LIVE on air on ‘Ask Dr. Karen‘, in my workshops, on national TV, radio, print media, Dr. Karen’s blog . . .

Re-connection, intimacy issues, sexual connection, relationship enhancement, communication, bonding, infidelity, infertility, re-finding their love lost, . . . these are just but a few of the topics couples request my guidance.

Karen Ruskin – The Wife

In 1989 my now husband and I at 19 years old became a couple. In 1994 we got married at age 23. It is now 2013, we are 42 years old and are still married. Yes, to answer the question you may be wondering – we are happy to have found each other and happy to still be married.

Karen Ruskin – The Mother

In 2000 my husband and I had our child. What a blessing and a miracle to be parents.

Marriage

Here I am, a marriage therapist, a wife, and a parent. Simply by sheer years and my personal and professional experiences, we cannot argue with the fact that I have been around with much more personal marital experience then Crowder, much more parenting experience then Crowder, and much more experience of what couples go through during their various stages and phases of marriage as a marriage therapist then Crowder. I read his article and I say; “bravo”.

Crowder breaks marriage down from his perspective as a young male as though he has been in a healthy marriage for years, as though he has kids of his own and has navigated those challenges while remaining in a healthy marriage, and as though he knows from clinical experience. I say “as though”, because it is indeed as though, as he is right on target. I am confident that he will receive some negative commentary from those of whom are divorced, or unhappily married. It is those early years of marriage that is often referred to as “the honey moon phase” for a reason. Marriage is a journey that goes through much as the years continue. Challenges and obstacles are a normal course of one’s marital experience (e.g., communication disharmony, different parenting styles, arguments, job loss, financial duress, sexual need differences, illness, addiction, extended family issues, infertility . . .) It is not whether a couple will be confronted with pain, even with trauma, they likely will be. I know this to be true professionally and personally. Rather, it is how the couple copes with, adapts, adjusts and works as a couple team through the many challenges. That will be the test of time.

I enjoyed his article from beginning to end. Some may feel his articulations are naive and coming from a place of youth. I am here to voice that what he writes is indeed possible and probable for some and for many, but sadly not for all. Although this young man has had none of these long term experiences in marriage to speak of, and his voice is from a newbie in the marriage world, has no children, and he is not a marriage therapist – I still say his points are well taken and valid. Coming from a young man, perhaps other young men will hear his perspective and be interested in considering his voice, or perhaps not. Either way, I am interested in sharing my nod in agreement of what I have read.

I am passionate about helping couples of all ages and have seen the greatness of couples who work on their marriage growth. I enjoy working with couples young and old, and at any and all stages and phases of their marriage. It is the couples who are vested in and passionate about their relational marital success that experience the beauty of its impact system wide. A healthy and happy marriage impacts self emotional and physical well being, children, and our professional well being.

Dr. Karen’s Marriage Manual

In my book; Dr. Karen’s Marriage Manual, I offer concrete do-able tips, practical advice, and helpful insights for a happy and healthy marriage. The many struggles and challenges couples face are discussed with suggestions and advice for problem solution resolution. Tips include:
  • Operation Appreciation
  • Water The Plant Of Marriage
  • Be Your Spouse’s Biggest Fan

and more… 40 marriage must do’s, 29 marriage don’ts, along with techniques for the most common and uncommon marital challenges for couples at any stage and phase of the marital journey.

Dr. Karen Ruskin to Steven Crowder – What’s Your Grade?

A+ for your grade Crowder! Agreed- people who are pro marriage and experience its joys and success should speak up. This is me, Dr. Karen Ruskin- speaking up, as always. Enjoyed your article from start to finish as analyzed from my perspective as a marriage therapist, and as a person who has been married for 18 years (will be 19 years on May 1st 2013).

 

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