Brockton Child Rapper Luie Rivera Jr., AKA Lil Poopy, 4th grader age 9 is the topic of much debate this week. As a parenting expert and family therapist for 20 years, I find the controversy outrageous. During my interview on FOX 25 News Boston I explain that this is unacceptable and a clear issue to me, in my humble opinion as a mental health/wellness expert. In this blog I address the following talking points:
- Entertainment Art
- Standard Of Care
- What’s In A Name
- Warning Signs
- Now What
Entertainment Art
Are you kidding me? Is this some kind of a sick joke? Some adults are stating that the videos of Luie rapping is entertainment art. To have a child being told to spank the buttocks repeatedly of an adult female while she simulates sexual intercourse on the floor is absolutely NOT entertainment art, says this Psychotherapist. To have an adult woman thrust her tush and grind it into a 9 year old boy’s crotch, or into a child’s crotch of any age, and continue to grind is unacceptable! To think that this is acceptable to some adults is unbelievable! This is bad for the mental wellness of children and adults.
Standard Of Care
- This is true over-sexualization of our youth.
- Adults should not be interacting for any reason in a sexual way with children. Adults should not be seeing this as acceptable behavior to do with children in public nor in private.
- Children should not be taught to believe interacting in a sexual way with an adult is acceptable in public or in private. Just because a video camera is filming an interaction does not define it as art nor as acceptable.
- Our standards of child care, our standards of child mental health and wellness in our country have really hit rock bottom if we believe we should turn a blind eye to this type of behavior and say it is entertainment art.
- Statistics show that 1 in 4 girls and 1 in 6 boys are sexually molested. 90% of the time it is by someone that they know. Is this fact not of relevancy in how we as a culture decide what is considered actions that are helpful vs. hurtful, healthy vs. not healthy, contributing to the problems we as a country have vs. helping to problem solve?
What’s In A Name?
To have a nick name that you are hearing you are a little s*#t (Lil Poopy) creates a person who feels like a s*#t and therefore acts like a s*#t as one ages. A person then treats others like s*#t because that person is a s*#t. To be called a “cocaine cowboy” (another nickname for Luie) as he performs with a group called Coke Boys, is condoning drugs. Is this not obvious?
In my parenting book: 9 Key Techniques For Raising Respectful Children Who Make Responsible Choices, I include a section where I discuss the danger of nicknames. This is a top parenting don’t, as a child defines themselves based on their name. What’s in a name? Answer: your identity. Thus, your self worth, self view, self treatment and treatment of others will all be affected with a negative nick name.
Warning Signs
Lindsay Lohan, Adam Lanza- what do they have in common? Both in the news with experts saying that there were warning signs when these young adults were children. Many would say things like; why didn’t anyone step in when they were young to prevent? Here we are, the police have stepped in calling upon the Department of Children and Families to investigate if there is child neglect in the case of Luie. Can you believe that there are many in an uproar about this, stating that the police should mind their own business? So, which is it I ask you? Do we as a society mind our own business when we see warning signs in front of us or do we take action?
Now What?
So, what do we have? Answer: condoning drugs, low self worth, and doing what others are telling you which is to slap a woman’s buttocks in a club while adults are egging you on – all at the ripe old age of 9. On what planet can we think this is acceptable? On what planet can we believe this is wise? I repeat: just because a video camera is recording does not make one’s behavior right, healthy, or art. We as a culture, our society, are defining and re-defining every day what is considered entertainment art, what is considered appropriate, and what is considered healthy. Now what? Let us choose to take back our standards, find our standards, and recognize before our very eyes what is not okay.
FOX 25 News Boston’s regular go-to Psychotherapist Dr. Karen Ruskin was interviewed by anchor Maria Stephanos to discuss. You are invited to view this interview below.
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